Yeah, this is whiny. You might just want to skip it. I can’t be, you know, relentlessly fun.
I don’t know how everyone else is doing, but I’ve had it up to here with this weather. I always dislike this time of year, anyway: all the summer programs finish up (like my beloved town camp), and school is looming, with the bustle of supplies and over-the-summer homework and PTO jobs, but without the actual, you know, kids leaving the house for a while.
Seriously, we just all do better when we have a little time to ourselves. My workout time takes a precipitous dive when the kids are with me all day, because I simply cannot wake up any earlier than I already do. Don’t even ask. When the kids were away for a week I even tried to reset my body clock extra-early, and it just didn’t happen. I’d lose track of time and it would be 2 am and I’d be feeling super. I’m better at night. I’m barely functional in the morning. So Unworked-out Mommy is a teensy bit less patient.
The girls have been playing together pretty well in the mornings. I do the dullest chores ever and they play until I suddenly realize that I’ve devoted two hours to cleaning the fridge and now they’re sick of each other and starving. So then I make lunch and attempt to get us out of the house and results vary. One day it was a playground (wild success), another day errands (really poor: I pulled the car to a screeching halt twice to turn around and chastise them), and today I attempted the pool when a brief glimmer of sunlight filled me with unwarranted optimism. I believe that it was our most dismal trip to the pool ever.
Really, I’ve just been in a shame spiral lately. M’s been extra obnoxious, including pushing her most effective button the other day, about how Mommy doesn’t work or, you know, do anything. Which, I’d have to say, makes me angry for a good 48 hours, at least. Then today she got herself sent to her room for 35 minutes. This after I started at ten minutes. Meanwhile, J has developed an unidentified rash that may or may not be clearing up. Her legs are also a freaking mess of bug bites from when she was away on vacation last week without Mommy to nag about bug spray. There was also some slacking in the pierced ear care, leading to some infected yuckiness. She kept claiming that it didn’t hurt, and I had no idea if the redness might be rash- or bug-related. And then an earring fell out in bed, which I didn’t notice until it had already begun to close. So last night there was a painful, pussy and emotionally draining re-piercing ceremony at bedtime. I feel like I’ve really earned my Crappy Mother of the Week badge.
In short, it’s not all about the weather. But I can’t help thinking that a little warmth and sunshine will buck us all up a bit. It’s supposed to be coming. It better be.